How to Succeed in the Workforce

Lie in the application and hope that they don’t notice, then try to only work in teams to hide your incompetence.

What do you have to lose if you’re found out? Nothing. What do you gain if you’re not? Phat stacks, that’s what. Ever heard of a cost/benefit analysis?

Obviously you can’t say that you know high-level technical skills that can’t be fudged - like being fluent in a language that you don’t speak. Though if you work in some asshole office or whatever then it’s probably fine.

If you lose the job then who cares? You wouldn’t have got it if you told the truth anyway.

If you feel bad about cheating some company out of money or a good employee or whatever; don’t. Your only role is to get a job. It isn’t your job to weed applicants out of Company X’s selection process. The fact that the recruiter is bad at their job is none of your concern.

This is a victimless crime. Only chumps act ethically in the face of victimless crimes. Whether you can benefit from lying on your application or by investing in an unethical business - it’s your duty to do it.

Related: Don’t feel bad about making a profit from unethical business practices

As a last point; you may be found out in the end, but if that does happen, it could take enough time for you to earn at least one pay check of fraudulent money! Crime money! Kaching!