No, I don't want to Hear about your TV Show Recommendation

Before we start: While TV blows, cinema does not. See what movies tickle my fancy and what I’d rather forget, with Stoski’s Ultimate Movie Ratings Guide: Your ultimate guide to movies that specifically Stoski likes, loves, dislikes, and finds ‘just alright’. You can also read all of my monthly movie reviews and miscellaneous movie content.

Let me make this perfectly clear; I don't want to know about what show you're watching, I don't want to hear about how much I'd apparently like it, and I certainly don't want to hear about how badly I "need to watch it".

Do you know how many “amazing” television shows exist right now, and continue to be made every year? We are living in a new golden age of television wherein dozens upon dozens of television shows earn top ratings and are considered, by many people, to be “must watch” affairs. New shows are coming out all the time, while the old ones stick around waiting to be watched. The number of “must watch” shows continues to grow. There’s no “well I missed the last one but I’ll get this one”. It’s become “I have to watch the last one and then I’ll watch this one”. It’s a relentless onslaught that never stops, demanding ever more time to keep up with the latest and greatest series now streaming on your platform of choice, at no extra cost to you.

“So what’s the problem?” some might ask. “Innovative, high-quality entertainment, delivered straight to your eyeballs, for next to nothing? What’s not to like? Even if you or I don’t like any particular set of shows, there’s an endless multitude to choose from. Just pick one and you’re off to the races. Besides, hundreds of movies are released every year, far greater than the amount of television shows, and I don’t hear you complaining about that!”

Not so fast! While it’s true that far more movies than television shows exist and continue to be released, the difference is that movies respect your time. A movie tells a story in 2-3 hours, sometimes less. In that time, you get all 3 story arcs and usually zero filler. What does the same amount of time buy you in TV land? A whole lot of jack shit; either 3 hour-long episodes or 6 half-hours. You may get some story beats, sure, but you also get a lot of fluff and a lot of filler. Shows have a lot more time to work with so they can spend more of it on inconsequential bullshit, or just padding the runtime. Shows don’t give a shit about you or your life.

Don’t forget that there is also a lot more of a show than there is a movie, even when there exist multiple movies in a franchise. We’ve already established that shows have more time to work with, but that doesn’t even come close to explaining just how long it takes to watch a television show. Breaking Bad has 62 episodes in all 5 seasons. Game of Thrones has 73 episodes in 8 seasons! Even watching all day, for 16 full hours every day, it’ll take you 8 full days, and part of the 9th day, to see all of both shows. Both! That means two! Just two shows, by themselves, are more than 120 hours long! What about the others?! That’s thousands of hours of content, potentially only including shows that one person might want to watch. The total? Unthinkable.

Then there’s the fact that people can’t just spend all their time watching tv. Most people wouldn’t even want to spend all of their free time watching tv. We have other shit to do - we have partners and kids and bills and events to attend and friends to spend time with and it goes on and on. In short; people have lives and don’t have time to sit around watching tv all day. We also have games to play and podcasts to listen to and books to read. Other entertainment media exist, and the discerning consumer would like to partake in at least some of it.

So, considering all that, considering the sheer number of “must watch” shows, the length of time it takes to properly experience each one, and considering the huge amount of other things there are to occupy one's time - ask yourself; do I really need to hear about this “great new show”?